


My R (Song Fic)

by StarTrashQueen



Category: Hataraku Maou-Sama! | The Devil Is a Part-Timer!
Genre: Angst, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-24
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-06-15 11:56:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15412374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarTrashQueen/pseuds/StarTrashQueen
Summary: Based off the song “My R”





	My R (Song Fic)

**Author's Note:**

> The song used is called “My R” or “Watashi no Aaru” the lyrics https://youtu.be/AOV2c0TiPpI (the song itself) I used were done by Rachie https://www.youtube.com/user/splendiferousfantasy (her channel) I made slight edits but most of the lyrics are hers!

~Just as I was about to take my shoes  
Off of the rooftop there I see  
A pathetic girl right in front of me  
Despite myself I go and scream~

Urushihara had snuck out of the one room apartment to a secluded building near by. It was all too easy to get to the rooftop, horrifyingly easy despite the fence that separated the main floor to the buildings edge. This was proven by him not being the only person on the roof. He realized the he knew this person. He saw her almost every other day. Her tearful eyes met his and it didn’t take a genius to figure out what she was doing here. Before he realized it words fell from his mouth.

“Hey don’t do it please!”

~Woah, wait a minute what did I just say?  
I couldn’t care less either way  
And to be honest I was somewhat pissed  
This was an opportunity missed~

Urushihara was taken aback by his own words. He was a demon general, why should he care about this human girl’s life? He’s taken countless other lives and this girl was absolutely nothing special. She was stupid, and naive to think she could actually think she could form a meaningful bond with Maou. 

~The pathetic girl told my her woes  
You’ve probably heard it all before  
“I really thought he would be the one  
But then he told me he was done”~

He didn’t know why she told him of all people. She probably thought he would just watch her free fall. She probably just told him why she was doing this because he’d be her only witness. But seriously? All because Maou turned down her feelings? He gripped his hands into a fist and started yelling at her. 

~“For God’s sake please!  
Are you serious?I just can’t believe!  
That for some stupid reason you got here before me!  
Are you upset cause you can’t have what you wanted?  
You’re lucky you’ve never gotten robbed of anything!”~

He recalled being stripped of his high status and demoted to this pathetic existence. He didn’t have anything here that gave him a feeling of worth. 

~“I’m feeling better thank you for listening!”  
The pathetic girl then disappeared~

Her tears still continued to fall, but a smile grew on her face. Chi gave him a hug before waving goodbye, probably not paying any mind to why he was here himself. He couldn’t do it today. He just looked out at the surrounding buildings and saw Chi waving at him. He didn’t wave back, only looked down. 

~Alright, Today’s the day.  
Or so I thought  
Just as I took both of my shoes off  
There was a girl short as can be,  
Despite myself I go and scream~

It was a few days before he could sneak out again, but he made it back to the same tall building, yet once again there was someone else there. He looked at her and got her attention, and she turned with her cold eyes. 

~The petite girl told me her woes  
You’ve probably heard it all before  
“Everyone ignores me no one cares  
I don’t belong with you all here”~

She probably saw no point in hiding what made her feel like this. Suzuno was always blunt and to the point. Her reason was better than Chi’s but honestly it pissed him off that these girls didn’t realize how good they had it. 

~“For God’s sake please!  
Are you serious? I just can’t believe!  
That for some stupid reason you got here before me!  
Cause even so you’re loved by everyone at home.  
You’re always welcome for dinner you know.”~

Everyone always welcomed the girl who actively tried to kill them all in various ways. He did the same thing yet was treated like his very existence was a nuisance. He felt like these people he knew for years never forgave him, but welcomed this stranger with open arms. He didn’t think it was fair. 

~“I’m hungry” said the girl  
as she shed a tear  
The girl short as can be then disappeared~

Suzuno’s normally calm and stoic expression, turned to one of gratitude. She walked past him with a smile and a small wave. She probably disregarded his words too. 

~And like that there was someone everyday  
I listen to their tales  
I make them turn away  
And yet there was no one who  
Would do the same for me, I know  
There no way to let out all this pain~

It was just his luck. Every single time he managed to sneak out, someone was always there before him, each with an equally lame reason. Every time he managed to get them to realize they had more to live for than they thought. He helped all of these people yet not a single one stopped to ask why he himself was there. Humans and demons alike, are both selfish creatures. 

~For the very first time there I see  
Someone with the same pains as me  
Having done this time and time again  
The angel girl looked at me with disdain~

He hated the look she gave him, but he’s used to it. It seemed like everyone looked at him like that these days. 

~“I just want to go back home  
But I have no purpose anymore  
That’s why I came up here instead”  
That’s the angel girl had said~

Despite the scornful look she gave him she still told him her reasons. It made his heart stop. He knew how it felt to be hated and have no purpose. That’s why he was up here. 

~Oh wait a minute what did I just say?  
I couldn’t care less either way  
But in the moment I just screamed  
Something that I did not believe~

“Hey...Don’t do it, please!”

~Ah? What to do?  
I can’t stop this girl oh this is new!  
“I’d be a hypocrite to try and stop you  
But even so please just go away so I can’t see  
Your hateful expression is just too much for me!”~

He didn’t know what to say to stop her. He couldn’t say anything about the others missing her because even if they did, they sided with Satan in the end. He couldn’t stop the tears that he had been holding in for so long. 

~“I guess today is just not my day”  
She looked away from me and then she disappeared~

Even if his words weren’t encouraging, she still turned away without a word. He briefly wondered if she noticed his confession, but gave up hope on that front. Nobody has paid attention before so there’s no reason for Emi to do so. Even if she did, she hates him so she probably wouldn’t care. 

~There's no one here today  
I guess it's time.  
It's just me, myself, and I.  
There's no one who can interfere.  
No one to get in my way here.~

 

Urushihara had gotten another opportunity to leave the apartment, and to his surprise there was nobody on the building that beat him here. He took a deep breath and took in the view. The silence that surrounded him was unsettling, almost every time he came up here, sobbing could be heard. He approached the end of the building and climbed over the fence

~Looking down to the ground below  
Watching here all alone  
This pathetic angel short as can be  
Is gonna jump now and be free. ~

He looked down at the long drop that awaited him, too consumed by his thoughts to hear the door to the rooftop open and the rushing footsteps that followed. He let out a sigh as he let go of the fence that stabilized him. He took a step forward but was yanked back by his shirt. Urushihara turned to see Maou gripping his shirt tightly so he wouldn’t fall. Although he himself didn’t fall, he could feel tears falling from his eyes as he sank to his knees. 

Maybe just maybe, someone cared enough to tell Maou, or maybe Maou cared enough to finally take notice. Either way Urushihara was still alive.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn’t know how to end this so ye


End file.
